Saturday, August 26, 2006

Ended up in the ER

Posted by JeanellePaige at 2:51 PM
So, I ended up in the ER last night. It was PACKED so I was there from 9:00 PM to 2:30 AM! It all started yesturday around 10:30 AM. I started feeling panicky, but not too bad really. I tried and tried all day long to 'get out of my head' but I couldn't. I kept fearing that my throat would close up again no matter what I did. I have post nasal drip I think, and that makes my throat feel icky and itchy and when my throat gets itchy that's when it closes up sometimes and I just couldn't stop fearing that it would. I worked myself right up into a full blown severe panic attack. My chest was so heavy and hurting, I was shaking uncontrollably, I was so terrified and dizzy and my fingers were tingly, and my jaw kept feeling like it was going to lock up. I was scared out of my mind! Brian rushed home from work early and my very awesome wonderful friend Wendy who goes to bed at 8 normally came over and drove me to the ER and stayed with me the whole time. She likes to talk, so she talked the whole time which helped so much because I was able to listen to her silly stories and take my mind off of my fears. There were a lot of tramas coming in, so we had to wait on a stretcher in the hallway, lol. So, they did blood work, throat culture, EKG... and found nothing. I am still going this Monday for the throat test and to see a specialist and I pray that whatver they find is totally and easily fixed, IF they even find anything. The ER doc gave me some zanex to calm me down, and it helped a bit. I also asked him to give me a prescription so I can not end up back in the ER again and he did. I went home, went to bed and this morning I woke up and started panicing again!! I tried to calm myself the best I could. I doubled up my regular anxiety meds this morning and that helped. (DR said it was ok) I drove to get my prescription filled for the zanex and took one of those. I still feel like I could start panicing at any moment. I am so tense that my jaw keeps feeling like it will lock up. My heart is having palpitations. I think maybe that could be because I have a cup of coffee, but it could be anxiety related. I just need to keep telling myself, "These symptoms do NOT mean that I am having a panic attack!" because if I think that I am, I will make myself have one. I just don't know HOW to calm down!! I don't know HOW to stop letting my thoughts be consumed with this fear! I WANT TO BE NORMAL AGAIN!!! I need help NOW! I can't stand another freaking moment like this I feel like I am going crazy and I feel like such a burden to my husband, worthless as a mother when I am like this. If any of you know some great relaxation techniques I would LOVE to hear them. Thanks for reading about my insane crazy stupidness.

9 friends stopped by to say...:

Anonymous said...

Oh Jeanelle, how terrifying! I will pray that they find some easy fix that will help the throat problem and lessen the anxiety attacks. I have them too so I know how they can be so scary. Take it easy.. Dawnee

{Paige} on 8/26/2006 8:40 PM said...

Hang in there Jeanelle! Your in my thoughts and prayers that this passes quickly for you. I can't even imagine how a panic attack must feel. Please take care of yourself!!!

lukasmummy on 8/26/2006 10:14 PM said...

Oh hun ((((((hugs))))))) I really hope you feel better soon or the doctors find something to help.

Andrea Cox on 8/27/2006 3:53 AM said...

Hang in there Jeanelle! I'm sorry that you're going through this, I know it's not easy. If the Xanax doesn't work make sure and have them try another med, each med works differently for each person. My mom had these and she had to take Ativsn for them in order to get relief. Panic attacks suck and they are incredibly scary! I don't have any cool relaxation techniques for you :( I hope the docs can figure something out for you!! ((HUGS))

Sandy on 8/27/2006 7:21 AM said...

Jeanelle, how scary! I used to be a therapist in an anxiety clinic. Try looking into "progressive muscle relaxation". It's good because it gives you something concrete to focus on when your mind is going in circles. Basically, you start at the top of your body and clench and unclech the muscles (the theory being that you are intentionally putting them into a state of relaxation by fatiguing them.) There are lots of good websites that walk you through it. The key is to practice every day so that you train your body and it is second nature when an attack comes and you really need it. Good luck!

Angi said...

I have lived with this all my life. The only thing that helps long-term is therapy. Start learning to substitute good voices to take over all the negative voices in your head. And yes, Xanax helps. I've been taking something similar for 13 years now.

Natalie on 8/27/2006 9:54 PM said...

Big, big hugs to you, Jeanelle. I wish had something more helpful to say, but I just wanted to let you know that someone else cares and hopes you find some help to end this, or at least know what to do when you feel it happening.

Anonymous said...

Asalamalaykom Jeanelle,

Whew. That's a breath. You need a breath. A good clean, relaxing breath that gives you a clear mind and oxygen for a calm body.

Breathe in on the count of four. Hold it for four. Release it in four. It works.

No coffee. Bad coffee.

Exercise? Are you getting any? I don't mean running after the kids. I mean a walk in nature. A bike ride around the lake? Do it. Your life is depending on it.

You have this great life and you can't live it right now. Stuff all the stupid things in life (people who drive you nuts, TV shows, computer, keeping up with the Jonses) and just focus on what's real and good.

Pray. I don't know what faith you are, or if you believe. Believe in the world being a good place. I am Muslim, as you know. We praise God 99 times by touching our thumb to the three joints on each finger and saying thanks to God (elhumdullah) for 33 things--close your eyes and visualize them...what are you thankful for? Do each finger on both hands. Then 33 times May God forgive(astragferallah) for bad things that you did, or you heard or saw someone else do. Then for the greatness in life say God created it (subhanllah) for 33 things that are beautiful and awe inspiring.

I wish you peace. Peace doesn't come from a bottle. The bottle is a temporary solution. The lasting peace comes from somewhere else. You have the intelligence and the feeling to find it too.

When you feel scared, say, "May God protect me and keep me away from harm." Then take that breath.

You are loved.

Kim Hill on 8/29/2006 9:54 PM said...

Oh Jeanelle, I'm so sorry you are having such a tough time right now. I'm not prone to panic attacks, but I can certainly relate to stress and I try to do some sort of meditation daily. If you can, go get a massage and ask the massage therapist to play some calm music and tell her/him not to talk to you. Take long, slow, deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth. While you are lying there, think about the most pleasant space you can think of. It doesn't have to be real or even a place you've ever been. I always meditate about a mountain high in the hills. My meditation always starts with me walking out the front door of my house and walking to this mountain.....I pass a variety of beautiful things along the way - flowers, trees, a lake, etc. Usually by the time I get to the mountain, I am ready to fall asleep. It truly helps bring me back to center. I hope this helps you out. Hang in there.


..Life.. as I know it. {JPDESIGNS}